The Longest Wait

My ovaries had 3 nice size follicles on Monday.
We did the HCG trigger injection Monday night.
On Wednesday we did our "turkey baster".
Kevin had lots of little guys.
And the doctor says he thought we did well timing wise for me.
The chances of it working are about 10% less than the natural rate of pregnancy.

So we came up to the mountains for a mini vacation.
No alcohol.
No jarring.
No hot tubs or saunas.
That limits our activity at a snow/ski resort.
It is the first of many sacrifices I am sure.
Lots of sleeping in and reading books.
We can take a home pregnancy test on January first.

So we wait.

And wait.

And wait.

This evening we went to sit on one of the comfy couches in front go the many Christmas trees at our resort's lobby.
I am finishing a book.
Kevin playing some games.
Another family sits across from us.
They are so close I cannot help but hear their conversation.
One of the women is about 7 months pregnant.
The other lady asks her if she is loving being pregnant.
"No, it is just awful." She is moving like she is 13 months pregnant.
They continue to talk about others who are pregnant.
"So-and-so is pregnant with triplets."
One of the older men comments "Probably one of those people doing fertility treatments" with disdain in his voice.
I wanted to pipe up.
I wanted to storm away.
I wanted to scream.

Some people just can't get knocked up all by themselves.
It does not make us less human.
It does not make us bad parents.

Just parents who are waiting.

Eggs, Eggs

We are now on our third cycle of Femara.
Dr. Brown increased my dosage from my first two rounds.
Man oh man, my emotions were doubled as well.
I cried at the most ridiculous things.
Work. Facebook videos. Family.

Back to the doctor tomorrow to check the follicles.
I am nervous.
What if I already ovulated?
What if I missed the window?

To imagine how many people get pregnant everyday.
Without. Even. Blinking. An. Eye.
Timing is so crucial.

Sigh...