And it expands without me.
I really want to be happy for my friends.
And I am.
I really am.
I want to celebrate with them and ask them questions.
These are good people who will be good parents.
But I cannot help to feel left out.
They talk about strollers.
Travel systems.
Maternity leave.
And I sit.
I have to turn my face.
So you don't see my sadness.
Then my body feels heavy.
My laugh is forced.
My mind is focused on something else.
And after I leave you, I will cry.
My disappointment is with me.
My body.
My failure.
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